So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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