We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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