I cockslap morals
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Randomize
