one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
