Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
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