I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
