Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
