...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Me. At least after what I've been through.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
