were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
