The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
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