I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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