i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize
