Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
