there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize