I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
