She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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