Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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