This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
