My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i will never coherently bang her
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize
