Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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