Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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