Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Randomize
