I need help removing her.
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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