My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
