i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Randomize
