Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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