How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
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