I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
