Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
