Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
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