We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
