Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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