It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
