someone get that fucking seahorse.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
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