Sry I called you an 8
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
