I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
