you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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