I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
