Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
