Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Your shirt... Was in my pants
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
