Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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