Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
