And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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