i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
