I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Randomize
