i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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