P.S. I can't hear my feet
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize