I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
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