hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Randomize
