You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
