he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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