We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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