If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
